Help is available for families of alcoholics

A few weeks ago this column touched on domestic violence, and it seemed to be familiar to many local families. Soon after, our community had its own encounter with the vilest of home violence; a mother shot her adult son, then herself.

I do not know this family nor their circumstance. Whenever a crime occurs, rumors fly, and I have no way of knowing where the truth lies. The mother was quoted as saying she could no longer live with the son's alcoholism. For those who have lived in close proximity to an alcoholic, this makes perfect sense.

I know another family much like this one in another state. I had hired the youngest son to design some graphics, and after a week or two of silence I emailed him. "Sorry, family emergency," was all I got back. A sympathetic friend sent me a link to the chilling news article; his father had killed his older brother after years of dealing with alcohol and drug-related behavior.

There is no such thing as a "typical" alcoholic. The National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism has identified five subcategories of alcoholics.

The largest group this study identified are young adults. These are generally people who have no family history of alcoholism and who do not show evidence of mental disorder or other types of substance abuse. Most of these do not ask for help for their alcoholism.

The second group comprises 21% of alcoholics and are referred to as "antisocial." they may have antisocial personality disorder, major depression, or other psychiatric disorders.
Functional alcoholics, about 19% of all alcoholics, are usually middle-aged, educated, family types. Half are smokers; 1/3 have a family history of alcoholism.

Right behind the functional are the 19% called Intermediate familial alcoholics. Many of this group have had clinical depression or bipolar disorder; most smoke, and half come from strong family histories of alcoholism. Only about 15% seek help from professionals for their alcoholism.

The Chronic, Severe Alcoholics comprise 9% of the population. The may have started drinking early, and are now middle aged. This group shows exceptionally high rates of antisocial personality disorder, criminal behavior, and multigenerational alcoholism. I was present when a chronic "hardcore" alcoholic was told that at this point in his life, these were the things he had to look forward to: hallucinations, seizures, and death. I also saw the man walk out two weeks later and buy the biggest bottle of alcohol he could find--and drink it.

Today's column was more about the people who live with the alcoholic -- the mother, father, step-parent, siblings, spouse, and children. The average alcoholic strongly affects at least 8 people in his life time.

The most popular self-help group for the families of alcoholics is called Al-Anon. It's different from Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) in that it's for the families, not the person who drinks. Members gather in order to support, educate, inform, and help each other. Everything at these meetings is kept anonymous. One person says "the help you get there would be good for anyone, even a normal person with no alcoholic in their life. But when you live with an alcoholic, you have to have it; it's a lifeline."

In the Tri-Cities Area, I've found the following Al-Anon groups:

Abingdon, VA
Sinking Springs Presbyterian Church 136 E Main St
Tues/Th 8pm

Bristol, VA
Central Presbyterian Church 301 Euclid Ave
8pm M,W,SA

Elizabethton, TN
Watauga Baptists' Assn Bldg 3871 Hwy 19E
TUE 6pm

Greeneville, TN
Cumberland Presbyterian 201 N Main
Tues 7:30

Johnson City, TN
Cherokee UMC, 2615 S Roan
Th 7 pm

Johnson City, TN
REBOS Bldg 213 E Maple St
Sat 4:30

Johnson City TN
Harrison Christian Church 2517 Browns Mill
Tue 10 am

Johnson City
Covenant Presbyterian Church 603 Sunset Dr
Tue 7:30
Th noon

Kingsport, TN
Renaissance Center 1200 E Center St
Tues noon
Th 8pm

Kingsport, TN
Holy Trinity Lutheran Church 800 Broad St
Mon 8pm

Mountain City, TN
Action Coalition Bldg 138 E Main St
Mon 7pm

For more information, please visit http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/

To find an online group to participate in, or to chat with someone online right now, please click on

http://www.ola-is.org/olais/chat.htm